in the blood?

anyone who's seen the inside of my dad's shop knows what it's like... he's got stuff lining the walkway, stuff stacked up, stuff stashed away, stuff piled up, stuff strewn around, stuff in drawers, stuff under tables, stuff in cupboards, stuff packed in boxes, stuff in tins, stuff on tins, stuff hanging on hooks, stuff behind doors, stuff forming walls.... well basically he's got lotsa stuff. An organised chaos i must say, cos if you asked him for something, he'll produce it after digging around for a while. So, he knows where he put what.

The scary thing is that when we went back for chinese new year, to my granddad's shop, i found things pretty much the same. My granddad ain't around anymore, so it's just my step-uncle and step-grandma but the similarity of conditions were well.... scary.

I find that if i don't check myself, i have a tendency to hoard and keep stuff too. Everything has some use later on. You never know when you'll need it! (most probably a day after you throw it away). Of course in my store, i have to keep the showroom area spic and span. I'm a real pain when it comes to that, ask Khairul or Ee May. I'll be adjusting price tags and displays to make sure they're absolutely straight. Setting demo units so they are exactly aligned to the table. But how about the workshop? Well, it helps that there is a huge window so people can look straight in, but it sure needs some tidying up too.

for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these...

over the chinese new year holidays, i met (and entertained) a few special relatives... some i only see once in a year... some i am meeting for the first time...

Aunty Lai Leng says that Wei Wei was asking in the car if sooaun kor kor was going to be there... this little bundle of energy is really quite a handful... thankfully bobby carrot kept him busy after i ran out of breath pushing him around in a hand truck (the kind they transport softdrink crates in)...

The last time we saw Evan, he hadn't begun to talk and was not very communicative. But when our cousins Andrew and Rachel paid us a visit two days ago we really enjoyed him this time. From his "oopsie daisies" to "perodua" and "proton". And he replies in full sentences when asked questions! Besides my hairy legs, Roscoe wasn't spared as highway for his police car ;)

Sophia is Shaniz's niece, Shaniz is Joshua's wife and Joshua is Cheryl's cousin. Just so you know how we're related. i was surprised that she took to me so quickly and in a short time, we had named her pink bear ****** ****** (can't tell you, it's a secret ;)) When asked what her favourite color was, she answered, "pink, red, purple, etc..." At going home time, she hugged my leg and 'salam'ed my hand. i regret i was a little shocked by the sudden show of affection that i didn't say bye to her properly ;)

Here she is with Shaniz...

It was actually my encounter with Sophia that got me thinking about all the children in my life. The 20 odd ones i see every week for 3 hours at teens club, the relatives who are supposed to be closer but whom i don't see often enough to make a difference, the children of friends whom we enjoy watching grow up and may lend a hand in bringing up later... And then my thots move on to the many children who need so much more attention and love then they're getting and i realise that instead of getting depressed about the children i don't have, i should dedicate more time and energy to these...

the remedy

i haven't been very stable recently... tears well up in my eyes and blur my vision without warning, i choke a little to hold back... the numbness in my heart doesn't feel like a hot iron searing but like when a sharp blade cuts, you don't feel the pain initially but then the blood starts oozing out... there is a deep feeling of dread that comes from my gut... the more i think the more i feel overwhelmed, the more i feel overwhelmed, the more depressed it get... i try to think logically, but some things defy logic... i look to the Bible, it has the answer, at least one half of it... but the truth is not always easy nor is doing the right thing... especially when man have devised many other solutions...

but i discovered a remedy yesterday, no matter what we are going through in life, all it takes is one look at the Saviour and how blessed we are to be in Him...

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me 

- excerpt from 'Who Am I?" by Casting Crowns

fashion prude

yayyyyyyy! finally!

JOY

i experienced a rare feeling on saturday... somewhere inside the chest, towards the center, slightly higher up from where one would feel hunger. it happened while singing, during teens' club meeting. it was brought about by the sight of the children (mostly round-faced and sweaty), singing at the top of their lungs and earnestly trying to follow the actions. it was at that exact moment that i realised there was no where else in the world i would rather have been... how i pray that these young ones will come to know and love the Lord Jesus... these young ones who brink on innocence, so prone to being naughty and going the wrong way due to lack of guidance and proper upbringing... o Lord, use me to make a difference.

Soo Aun’s Plea

Dear friend,

I may have known you since school days or only just met you recently but I consider you a friend and that’s why you are receiving this plea. No, I am not into direct sales or MLM or any get-rich-quick scheme. There are just a few thoughts that I would like to share with you.

I’m sure at some point or other you would have wondered what you are doing with your life. We used to be young and had our whole lives ahead of us. Now when we meet, we talk about children and how quickly time flies and realize that we are still young but that life is passing fast. It’s always great to reminisce school days and laugh at things we did. But we also now look back and consider decisions we made in our lives and how things are working out. Some mistakes, some wise moves, sometimes thinking what would have happened if we took a different route.

Ok, so I’m getting old and long winded. So let me get to the point. We spend many hours each day working to earn money to sustain our lifestyle. We acquire a house and a car and more. We save some and spend some and invest some. We try and plan wisely for our future and our children’s future. We make sure we have savings for when we retire one day. My point is that we spend so much time and energy working towards something that will not last forever. How long can we live? 90? 100? That is a very short time if we consider history and we realize that we are here for only a brief moment. Which brings me to the point of this letter, my plea...

If you have put some thought into life, you would realize that things that are meaningful and priceless are relationships. Our family, our friends, people whom we cherish. Sadly, how often we hurt those we love the most. But I urge you to take some time to consider your relationship with someone special. Someone of outmost importance. The person who created you. “Ok,” you say, “now I know Soo Aun is a confirmed nutcase.” But hear me out before you trash this letter. You may call me a preacher or a fanatic or anything you want, but it is only because I treasure you as a friend that I am willing to risk that to bring your attention to this matter. Because it is very important.

My plea is that you take some time to search and discover for yourself, the truth of what it all means. I challenge you to invest a little time in things that will last for eternity¹, because when we die, we will not just disappear into nothingness. Although our bodies may rot, our spirit will live on. That is the difference between humans and animals. And that is also why we have an inborn desire to know and to worship God. We do not see animals praying to a tree or a bigger animal. But humans do. And I implore you to not worship other creation but to discover a relationship with the creator of all things.

I believe that Jesus is God, and he created the universe. But because man disobeyed God, he sinned and is now destined to hell². However, because God loves man, Jesus came to this earth as a human in order to die in our place, because he is sinless³. And because he is God, he rose from the dead. But most importantly, his finished work means that if anyone believes in him and receives him as their Lord and Savior, they have a living relationship with God and will not go to hell but have eternal life with Him³. I believe that the Bible is the Word of God and it reveals to us the person of Jesus and all that we need to know about Him.

I sincerely hope that you will consider these things that I have said. And take time to discover the truth about yourself and God. For it is most important. And although the next time we meet, you may look at me funny, it is still the same me lah…

Your friend,

sooaun.

1. “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:19-21

2. “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” Matthew 6:23

3. “But God demonstrates His own love towards us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” Matthew 5:8

4. “…if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.” Romans 10:9

back to the garden....

planning to spend the holiday tomorrow setting up my vegetable plot... the only problem is i'm too lazy to go into all the details... information online has everything from crop rotation schedules to how to make compost but all i want to do is plant the plant and watch it grow... and then watch it die... how depressing... a few of my plants have been dying, some are infested with white flies and i know some of them are being sucked dry by aphids... can you imagine the list of garden pests and disease?

Aphids

Apple Sawfly

Big Bud Mite

Bird Protection

Bitter Pit

Black Spot

Botryitis

Brown Rot

Cabbage Caterpillars

Cabbage Root Fly

Cabbage Whitefly

Cane Spot

Canker

Club Root

Codling Moth

Flea Beetles

Foot and Root Rot / Fusarium

Gooseberry Sawfly

Honey Fungus

Mangold Fly

Mildew

Moles

Mosaic Virus

Onion Fly

Onion Eelworm

Plum Sawfly

Raspberry Beetle

Rats

Red Spider Mite

Reversion Disease

Rust

Sawfly

Scab

Sclerotina Rot

Silver Leaf

Slugs!!

Spur Blight

Squirrels

Swift Moth

Vine Weevil

White Fly

White Rot

White Tip

Winter Moth

Wirestem

Wireworm

Woolly Aphid

truly depressing indeed...

these make me happy :D

can't get enough of the water hyacinths...


nothing beats getting a parcel in the post... what more if it's from your lil sista in UK! :)


first cherry on the cherry tree from pa and mum... cheryl has since eaten it ;)


when titus comes to visit! hehe... i mean, when guna and chin ai bring titus over :P

tomatoes in the tummy :)

hahaha.... i have to transplant the tomato plant into the ground or else we will only have this much cherry tomatoes to eat!

a vow that i will keep (by God's grace)

vows are very serious matters in the Bible... and rightly so... here's one i took some time back...

In the presence of God, and these witnesses, I, Soo Aun, take thee Cheryl, to be my lawful wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, 'til death do us part, according to God’s
ordinance of marriage.

also...

Wilt thou, Soo Aun, have this woman to be thy lawful wedded wife, to live together after God’s ordinance in the Holy Estate of matrimony? Wilt thou love her? Comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others keep thee only unto her as long as you both shall live?

I Will!

hurt and responsibilities...

why do we hurt? becos we do not get what we expect? why do the ones who love us most hurt us most? becos we expect the most from them? so, if someone hurts you, is it really their fault? maybe we shouldn't have expected so much from them...

but where is the line between expectation and responsibility? little Amy is hurting because her daddy doesn't have time for her. she expects her daddy to have time for her. is she expecting too much? isn't it her daddy's responsibility to spend time with her? so, it's her daddy's fault that she's hurting...

so, the expectation is dependent on the responsibility. if you have a certain responsibility then the expectation is that you fulfill that responsibility responsibly.

but can we live up to those responsibilities? i always argue that that is the difference between adults and children. children can get away with many things because they are immature and have to learn responsibility. children have to be taught and given responsibilities so that when they become adults they will be responsible. and adults have to be responsible for their actions that's why there are consequences to the things we do.

of course we still see adults who behave and live like immature children. they do and say things without weighing the consequences, and hurt people in the process...

so, as responsible mature adults, we have to sit down and consider our responsibilities. i tried doing this and realised that i have many. here are some examples. are you a...

son/daughter?
parent?
husband/wife?
in-law?
uncle/aunty?
nephew/niece?
cousin?
friend?
colleague?
neighbour?
employer/employee?
teacher/mentor?
student?
and the list goes on depending one how much you have going on in your life...

and for each of those relationships/positions we have responsibilities. are you fulfilling them?

flowers!

first bird of paradise flower! many more new shoots coming up...


see, even weeds have pretty purple flowers, how to pull out?


old man's darling, doing quite well in the ground... the ones in the pot are drying up :(


passion fruit flower! sorry for the lousy night shot, so far only seen it bloom at night. by day time it's all closed up... Cheryl's dad says the plant gets its name from the passion of Christ cos the flower has a cross in the middle and the sides are like the crown of thorns...

cracked pot plant

doesnt it look forlorn? i moved the pot from the shelf out to the open because the leaves were all straining towards the sun and they looked so messy. also, the color seemed to be changing to a faded green... we noticed small new leaves growing and realised one thing... the old has to make way for the new... so after pulling out all the old leaves we have a fresher looking pot of cracked pots!

baby tomatoes

These shots were taken over a month's time and they look like their ready to be eaten soon! Need to transplant the entire plant to the ground if it's gonna survive, cos the pot it's in is too shallow and it doesn't get enough water even tho i water it morning and night ;)

Policemen have been good to me this month

Got stopped on the way to Sg. Congkak while sending the children for YP camp. Roadblock was in front of the Sri Suria school. Policeman said my tinting was too dark but let me go after telling me to make it lighter. One of the boys in the car said his dad's car always gets stopped for the same thing. Hehe....
This morning got pulled over when i made a right turn at the silly times square traffic light. Policeman checked my id and license and said i don't look like i was born in 75 (haha). He asked if i was going to work and i said yes. Then he said he had to give me a ticket but i asked for a chance since it was holiday season and i had to spend alot of money. He said ok, but be careful in the future... Nice....

Teens class sleepover and barbeque

Had my teens class over for a sleepover last weds, then a barbeque and invited some of those who haven't been to our place before...

more garden shots

Aunty Rajesh gave us a few water hyacinth plants from her garden and the flowers bloomed today. Pardon the blue container they're in as it was the only thing i found to dump them into before rushing off for camp. Need to get another water pot soon...

creepy kinda thing....

so we're setting up our tent... we start by clearing the sticks and stones and other stuff from the site... Hwei Huih comes along with a camera and snaps a shot of jeya. She then turns to me and snaps a shot of me... just look what the result was... we never planned or even looked at each other... man... this is creepy....

off to camp! weee hoooo

Camp games! I was really stumped this time, but thank the Lord that He gave me some ideas. Hope they go well... Don't these little pouches look cute... Wonder what they'll look like after 40 kids lay their grubby hands on them...



Bloc and Roscoe in secret agent pose...

the Lord giveth, so we can't complain when it's gone...

First I was really upset when a whole branch on the vietnam apple tree broke cos the fruits were too heavy...

Now the tree is all dreid up and dead... who knows why?

Then, I come home today to find my fig tree broken! Aaaaargh... it was growing so well...
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blessed birthday...

blessed to have many people remember my birthday... must be thanks to friendster and facebook, i got messages and smses... of course you can always count on some people to remember for sure, and some to (almost) forget and then there are the surprises...

in reflection, the Lord was doing exactly what He was supposed to be doing and in His prime at 32... what about me?

jinxed car

ok, so we dont believe in pantang and stuff but this car is pretty jinxed if you ask me... it has been hit from behind twice, suffered smashed windscreens a number of times, and now a nose job...

well, depending on whether the glass is half full or half empty, maybe we can say instead that God has been gracious and protected the people in the car really well... in sunday night's incident, mum could have gotten hurt much worse as she wasn't wearing her seatbelt... thankfully both pa and mum are ok...

goodbye to a good friend...

i brought you everywhere i went... up mountains, across rivers, highlands, lowlands, parties, funerals, bangkok, anaheim, singapore, bali.

i used you to sell stuff, show stuff, record stuff, create stuff, shoot, capture and preserve stuff.

now that my memory sucks, how much i depend on you to remember places i've been, things i've seen, what me and others have done.

alas, it's time to part. first time you died it cost 400 bucks to bring you back. now, i will lay you down to rest... and search for another friend...














Goodbye Nikon CoolPix 4500, you have served me well...